Have a laugh – read your earliest writing

I’m cleaning house, otherwise known as getting rid of junk, and ran across some early writing.  I won’t say in which decade I wrote them, but I’m taking the stand it was before I could vote.  Grade school maybe.  I think they were written in crayon.  Yeah, they’re that bad.  They predate finding my “voice” and clearly show the influence of the authors I read at the time.  If those authors were angst-ridden masochists who were fond of including the character’s first name in EVERY LINE OF DIALOGUE.

Here’s a sample:

“How many men did you have after me, Lisa?  How well did you satisfy your hunger after you whetted your appetite with me?”

“Nick – ”

“My successors, Lisa,” he commanded.  “How many were there?  Who were they?”


As you can see, Nick was extremely fond of quotation marks.  He also shook Lisa a lot, yelled at her and wasn’t a very nice guy.  The anti-hero.  He had no character arc.  None of the characters did.

These tragic pieces are going in the trash.  I don’t need validation of how much my writing has matured.  I think I’ll find my humor in other areas from now on.

How bad is your early writing?  Do you still have samples tucked in a drawer?

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